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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No one will notice or care. Seriously. When was the last time you noticed someone’s engagement ring?[/quote]

I almost always do. I love looking at diamonds, and I love looking at the rings that have colored stones too. But my grandfather was a geologist and my first science fair project was about geodes, so maybe I'm not normal with this. [/quote]

I think you’re normal. I love looking at people’s rings (and other jewelry). They’re pretty—it’s kind of the point![/quote]

I think there is a distinction to be made between noticing someone's jewelry because it's pretty, or paying close attention to, specifically, the size of someone's engagement ring. One is a normal interest in beautiful things, the other is shallow and status-focused. Since OP is asking specifically about "upgrading" her ring to a larger stone, I think people are mostly talking about the second kind of noticing.

I went with a nontraditional engagement ring that has several small stones, none of which are diamonds. I really, really love it and it is totally my style in a way that a classic diamond ring would not have been. I can appreciate a pretty diamond ring, it just never felt like me. It's always interesting to me how people comment on my ring, if they do. Some people will simply say "oh that's pretty" or "that's unusual," both of which are true and totally fine comments. But some women will be weirdly apologetic about it, like they feel sorry for me that I don't have a big shiny diamond like I'm supposed to. It's always a little weird to me when women assume my ring, which I helped design, is an embarrassment or disappointment to me. It says so much more about them than it does about me.[/quote]

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