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[quote=Anonymous][quote=tabira][quote=Anonymous]

We ended up sending our kid to residential treatment - twice. It really did help. But like i said in an earlier post, it’s an ongoing struggle. Periodically suicidal and still gets hospitalized periodically - in fact just finished a month long inpatient, two parts of which were involuntary, and as you know it has to be really bad for insurance to pay for a month. Still medicated and not really a functional adult. But still alive.

I still have a hard time not being really angry at that doctor who didn’t listen. I feel like that was a turning point down a bad path and the doctor could have prevented it. [/quote]
Thank you for sharing. I can only imagine what you went through and what you are feeling now, as you seem to have been dealing with it longer.

Especially before a kid is 18 or before when they decide they don’t want parent’s help any more, we absolutely feel it’s on us to not give up and give her every advantage. Her inability to open up which limits the help she gets, we feel is not intentional but just yet another symptom of the problems she needs help with. She and we are yet to unjam that door to recovery. The good thing is she does want help and willingly goes to providers.

We are looking at residential care too. Deciphering, evaluating them is ten times harder. We are talking to one in WI, among others. Big commitment, minimum one month. They said could go up to 3 months. Basic rate is thousand a day. Insurance will pay, but not sure if it’s 100%. [/quote]

Me again. I have no doubt that you, like us, will give it your all well after your child enters adulthood. It just gets harder and different. And there are challenges you just don’t imagine. Like when your child is not competent to give the hospital permission to talk to you and you have no idea where they are so you’re panicking for days on end while you are trying to manage life - like your other kids and your job. And even after our kid stopped wanting/accepting help, we still work hard every day to help but have to find different ways.

I don’t mean to rain on your parade about RTC and insurance. But here’s the reality. Your carrier will tell you the limits of your coverage not actually what they will pay. And the program will tell you the ideals not how long they can actually get the carrier to cover. The carrier will do utilization review and cut the benefits as soon as they possibly can. They have criteria that you don’t know about that is used in this evaluation. Then you will have to decide if you can and/or will pay to keep them there.  Because the cost of a lawyer to sue is more than the cost of care itself.

I think it’s important to know this so you don’t get lulled into believing that your child will get everything she needs before they discharge her. It’s important because you will either need to be ready to write checks or ready for your step down services. And, having walked this path for awhile you know it’s hard to find services. So don’t think you are on break and that you have three months.

We got five weeks and I have unlimited coverage for RTC. Second time we got three - same coverage. My friend who has decent coverage and got the same message from the facility (guessing it’s the same one) also got five weeks. Lots of people I know got less. I know one person who got more but was still left hanging and it was a day by day review making it really tough to plan.

Also know that when you send them Away (and you have no choice because we lack those resources in the DMV), discharge planning falls on you because the program doesn’t have contacts or know the resources in our area.

If you’re looking at Wisconsin, I’m guessing Rogers. I hear good things about them and I know many people whose kids went there. They did not accept my child because they thought mine was too difficult. I appreciated the honesty but I would have sent them if it had been an option.

Again good luck to you. I will be thinking about you and hoping you find the resources that can turn things around.

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