Reply to People treating my “big” 8-year-old as much older than she is

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What are the expectations or ways she is treated older? 
This happens a lot with black girls, they look older ahead of white girls so get treated differently. Sexualized at a young age etc. it’s not ok. [/quote]

I use to be an educator and saw that first hand.  Especially with Black & Latina girls who were physically developed.  It was disheartening.

DD is white and so it’s not as emphasized as it would be for a taller, more developed Black or Brown child.

As far as expectations, I think many adults expect her to have the maturity and interest of a preteen.  If she and her friends are running around or being too loud adults tend to correct her faster (even one’s who know her age).  She gets a lot of, “you know better!” for pretty age appropriate and mild childhood misbehaviors (like talking out of turn).

Granted she is an extreme rule follower.  She’s very sensitive to criticism and is a major people pleaser.

With strangers it’s just the assumption she’s older.  At the park if she’s playing with 6-8 year olds their parents will ask her age.   If we go to a clothing store the clerks tend to point her to a clothing, shoe area geared towards preteens not kids.

The biggest issue is my mother.  It’s apparent she expects DD to act more mature than my brothers daughter who is only two months younger (petite, thin girl).   Her standards for her are higher and she’ll get onto her for essentially being a child.  It gets frustrating. [/quote]

OP,
I think you have lost sight of the bigger issue.  Your child is clinically obese.  Forget her looking older.  [/quote]

Have you examined the child? What credentials do you have that supersede her pediatrician?

Please answer. [/quote]

Plug her numbers into the children’s BMI calculator.  She is in these obese category by significant amount. BMI over >85th percentile is considered obese and she is at 97th percentile[/quote]

If ignorance is bliss PP, you must be very happy.  Instead of trying to diagnose someone you’ve never actually met or even seen over the internet, and attempting to second guess her actual pediatrician, perhaps you could put your skills to work researching the very well known drawbacks of using BMI as anything but a screening tool. Obesity is about fat. BMI doesn’t take into account different body types such as frame size and weight or muscles vs fat.  Maybe you could plug in a donut or something instead of spreading your obsessions.

I apologize for the derail, but PP’s persistent comments need to be checked. [/quote]

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