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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am the OP… This thread generated a lot of responses!

My father is well past the simply old-and- unsteady phase (during which time he fell many times) and now truly is feeble and almost bed bound, with a progressive neurological disorder that affects his reasoning as well as his balance. He has orthostatic hypotension which means that as he moves around he has extremely low blood pressure. He is only walking a little bit in the house with a walker, with someone next to him, and this is absolutely necessary because he is on the verge of falling down at all times. Walking around at Walmart or walking with a cane are not even possible options anymore.

He said he didn’t want a wheelchair, so we’re not getting him a wheelchair—But it seems clear to me that pretty soon he won’t be able to walk, and then what? I definitely agree there’s a “use it or lose it” issue to consider, but at this point just logistically getting him from home to, say, a doctor feels like it would be impossible without a wheelchair. I’ve gotten him in-home medical care but it certainly limits what he can do not to be able to leave the house ever except in an ambulance.

I am very sympathetic to how hard it is to get older and I feel sorry for him. But at the same time I have devoted **so much** time and energy to helping him be at home with caregivers. Not having a wheelchair as an option just adds this layer of complication and, honestly, it is seriously annoying. I’m usually very understanding and patient but sometimes the insistent denial in the face of reality gets to be too much for me and this whole wheelchair thing is an example of that.[/quote]

Thanks for coming back with more details!

You might consider getting a lightweight transport chair. Pitch it as for you, not him. You need it to hang your bag on. You’ll have someplace to sit while he’s being examined (just in case).  Your [fill in the blank] is acting up so it’s easier for you than keeping an eye on that damn walker that’s always trying to put its foot somewhere. You can go honk, honk at people and they’ll get out of the way. If the hospital/clinic already says he has to be in a wheelchair you can pitch it as his own, rather than one used by “the public.”

He might go for it. Or he might not go for it. If the latter, you’re at an impasse where you have to decide whether to hold your ground even if he doesn’t get to appointments (at least with you), or to keep doing it his way. [/quote]

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