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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I always hated the American concept of "playdate". It is an unnatural construct where one-on-one exclusionary play is the norm and it encourages mean behavior.

In my culture (Asian), we are used to a bunch of kids playing  inclusively and the moms/parents also hang around with each other to keep an "eye" on how their kids are behaving. No kids are turned away of they want to join.  Of course, a lot of healthy snacks/food and beverages is served for all.  Most of the time, the playtime happened organically and spontaneously. My house and yard was setup for hosting.

I pretty much stuck to my Asian culture even if my kids friends were Americans. I did not expect or get much reciprocity and that was ok by me.  I made sure that my kids got a lot of socialization and were connected to their roots. At some point they noticed that many of their friends were not reciprocating or were not hospitable but that did not make them upset or angry.  It just made them appreciate our traditions a lot more.

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This is such a weird take. I lived in China for many years so I get the concept of collectivist vs individualistic culture, but the idea that any sort of 1:1 time between humans is “American” and necessarily exclusionary in nature is just weird and seems wrong to me. Do you have an open marriage, too? When is it allowed, in your opinion, to cultivate individual relationships, or is that never appropriate? Usually others aren’t even aware a play date between two kids is happening except the two involved. Except in rare cases of mean kids who will find other situations in which to be mean, play dates really truly are not about exclusion. I think you just misunderstand or are projecting a dislike of American culture onto playdates.[/quote]

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