Reply to Good friend that I looked up to is a cheater

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[quote=Anonymous]I have a friend who had an affair and made horrible choices during that time. We don’t live near each other and I think that is what might have saved our relationship b/c my friend did a lot of lying to a lot of people during the affair.

I’ve known her and her ex for over twenty years and their relationship was good on the surface, but not good at its core, and I’m pretty sure they both cheated on one another through the years. It was sad that their marriage ended, but devastating in the way that it ended.

My friend and I have managed to keep our friendship, but she lost most others. I’ve never cheated and couldn’t fathom doing what she did to my family. I don’t condone her actions in the slightest. When I was younger and much more judgmental I would have ended our friendship on principle. But now that I’m middle aged my perspective is different. Maybe what’s also different for us is that my friend knows and owns her mistakes, has done a lot of therapy, and been very open with me - there is no hiding the truth and she doesn’t try to. [/quote]

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