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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you do not have experience with this, please don’t comment about how you’d never put up with it. I didn’t think I would either until I’m now living it

Dh has severe depression and anxiety. He’s in weekly therapy and on meds.  An intensive DBT has been recommended but he says he so far won’t do it.  He is very successful professionally.  At least every other month something “bad” happens (such as losing a key client) that spends him spiraling and then laying in misery in bed for a couple days.  He bails on all domestic responsibility, treats me rather rudely if I talk to him (either doesn’t respond at all or short one words). Eventually he snaps out of it and acts like it never happened.

Would you just accept this? Insist on more intensive therapy with threat of divorce? Something else? He won’t do anything different therapy wise unless losing his family is on the line.[/quote]

If I didn't have kids, I would be gone.
If I had kids (I do), I keep their welfare at the forefront. If and when their dad's mental health detrimentally impacts them, I will leave.
If he is verbally abusive (and certainly physically), I will make plans to leave.

It's an illness. And I hate the idea of abandoning a spouse when they are sick.  But it's an INFURIATING illness because it is so hard to watch when they won't help themselves. 
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