Reply to 41M too old for LTR with me (26F)?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "41M too old for LTR with me (26F)?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I met my DH when he was 39 and I was 27.  Now married 10+ years, so it can work.

But, our situation was a little different than yours.  We were both never married and no kids.  I had just finished grad school, and he was also a few years out of grad school (2 degrees, so took longer).

Age gap has not been a big deal, except he is now thinking about retirement and I am just entering the prime of my career.

It sounds like you and this guy are at different places in life, and that's a much bigger deal than the raw age gap.  [/quote]

I agree with this and I have had a similar experience. It's not the age gap specifically, but the rest of your differences that's perhaps a little too much. That being said, I'm not in your shoes, and [b]if this meant to be, it's meant to be[/b]. [/quote]

DP. Ugh, the bold backtracked on what was a good post. Please don't feed some "soulmates!" rose-colored-glasses notion in OP's head (or anyone's, for that matter). "Meant to be" and butterflies have their place, and it's not a place where OP and this man will still be in even a few years' time. With kids involved on both sides, she needs to be more pragmatic than "meant to be."

[b]To the OP:[/b] You said [i]you don't want more kids[/i]. If you stay with him, you are automatically getting three more kids, all at once. Unavoidably. No take backs. He will always give them priority over you--which is as it should be, but...he will always give them priority over you.

Do you really want to be a mom of four? Even if you like his kids, OP, you will be shocked at how going from one to FOUR at once will rock your world -- yes, even if you and he only have his kids 50 percent of the time.

Say goodbye, get a degree, get the best possible job, focus on your kid and have fun with your kid while kid is still young enough to adore having your attention (it goes fast, OP). Put serious dating on hold for a while until you look back at this man and can say with clear eyes, "He was great, but the situation would not have worked."[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics