Reply to How to pull away from a friend who only talks about herself, her kids, etc.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So sometimes I'm afraid to ask questions that could be deemed too personal or sensitive. I just assume if someone wants to share, they'll share. I know this is wrong, and I have begun to be better about posing questions, but it's possible she just figures you'd chime in with your own news if you wanted to share it.[/quote]

It's not wrong. I hate when someone starts interrogating me about my personal details and history. It's too intrusive.[/quote]

Same. Also I've learned that people who ask a lot of very specific questions of people are often info collectors and they then turn around and share this info with anyone and everyone. They might not even think of this as "gossip" but I do, so I've learned to be cautious around people like this.

I think it's presumptuous, too. You can't assume everyone is eager to talk about their family or their job or whatever.  If you let people share what they want, you don't wind up asking someone whose parents are alcoholics to please tell you all about them, or someone who loathes their job to explain exactly what they do. If they want to share those things, I'm happy to listen. But I don't ask those kinds of specific questions because I think it can really put people on the spot if they don't happen to have easy, small-talk friendly responses to them.[/quote]

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