Reply to Keeping a “secret” from the Father

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m in favor of the HPV vaccine (my daughter got it) but I don’t agree with your approach here.  How would you like it if her father made a medical decision about her without telling you?  Is there no way to have a rational decision with him on this? Or have her advocate for herself with him? Telling him that her doctor recommended it and she wants it.

FWIW - I think her father’s attitude towards sex is ridiculous. Even if she waits until she meets her spouse…no guarantee the spouse will have waited and she could still be at risk without the vaccine!!![/quote]

He doesn't have custody.  There must be a reason.  My kids' dad doesn't have custody.  He doesn't have custody because a judge decided that his behavior towards his kids, and towards me when we tried to negotiate things, demonstrated that he couldn't be trusted to make decisions safely and in the best interest of the kids.  So, now I get to make the decisions.  OP is in the same situation.  Either he has shown that he can't be trusted to make decisions appropriately, or he hasn't shown interest in being able to make decisions.  In either situation it's totally appropriate for OP to decide herself.

OP, I don't think keeping things from a custodial parent is a good idea.  But he's not.  So, I think it's fine. 
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