Reply to I don’t want to travel OR host for the holidays

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "I don’t want to travel OR host for the holidays "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, either invite them or don’t invite them. But there is no way you can “invite” them to stay in a hotel and make a holiday meal for you.

In your shoes, I would sit down WITH MY HUSBAND and I’d tell him:

“I’m not up for travel. If you would like to invite your parents to stay here, that is fine, but know this: I will not be hosting. Any cooking and cleaning, decorating and entertaining is on you. I’m going to be living home life as normal. I will not be changing sheets, cooking a holiday meal, etc. If you want to cook, go for it. If you want to order take-out, go for it. I am being very clear with you that I’m not up for being hostess with the mostess, so if you want to invite them, you are going to be the host on duty.”[/quote]

Hopefully this is something OP can do and her husband follow through with but I know my husband would overpromise and then not deliver in this scenario. [/quote]

OK? And then…I still wouldn’t do it. If they were asking what’s for dinner, “Bob will be taking care of it; please ask him.” If they arrive and there are no sheets on the bed, “Bob said he would be taking care of that, just go remind him and I’m sure he’ll handle it.” If they ask what’s for Christmas dinner, “Bob promised he’s got it covered—check with him.”

This may wind up with Chinese takeout for Christmas dinner. So be it. Maybe ILs will notice that Bob isn’t doing jack, so they’ll take the initiative to get some takeout menus together and make a plan. Don’t pick up the rope, and someone else probably will.[/quote]

Having my in-laws hanging around my house while I spend every minute deflecting to my husband who is hiding in his office sounds like a truly miserable Christmas. Pass. [/quote]

Nobody suggested that YOU do anything…you do get that, yes? This is advice for *OP.* *She* can decide whether this advice would work for her. [/quote]

I haven’t had to resort to this but I almost wish I had for the drama (wrings hands in anticipatory glee). Would love to see how it plays out. I kinda suspect my husband would outshine me in hosting. He would throw money and glitz at it rather than me thinking about cleanliness and logic. His parents would have smoked salmon breakfasts and escorted tours from our very house. There would be fireworks at night. He would show me up for sure. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics