Reply to I don’t want to travel OR host for the holidays

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It’s not rude to neither host nor travel. [/quote]

It is rude if the deal was alternating and OP’s family is still welcome on their years. [/quote]
It’s not a binding contract; you can change your mind as circumstances change. Sometimes you just aren’t up for it.[/quote]

Well, then I hope she’s fairly “not up for” hosting her parents too. Otherwise it’s just undisguised favoritism and nothing more.[/quote]

This attitude has never made sense to me. The choice of how to spend a holiday can actually be “we’re hosting the low maintenance guests who enrich our holiday but don’t require a lot of work on our part”

It’s not engraved on a holy tablet that we have to exhaust ourselves every year and the sooner people start acting that way the sooner we’ll have fewer Christmas threads here…[/quote]

This X1000. It’s rude for in the in laws to assume an invitation that they will be hosted, pampered and waited on. Declining to travel to them does not mean that OP and her husband are obligated to host them. Things do not need to be equal.

OP - if your in laws expect to be pampered then staying in a hotel or air bnb isn’t going to make things better. They will simply come over, park their butts on your couch and expect the pampering during the day and evening. If they are reasonable and like doing things independently then it can work but not if they are as they sound from your description. [/quote]

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