Reply to DD and fiancé are living way beyond their means. Do I say anything?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]MYOB works great until the children come begging for money for decades.

If DD is spending outlandishly, OP failed to teach financial sense and control (not judging, it's hard) and is well within their place to try to fix that.

Then if DD pushes back, OP did their part and is guilt-free to spend their money on more worthwhile pursuits than bailing out a spendthrift. 
[/quote]

I think it's OK to have a talk with DD about the perils of overspending.

You need to make it clear to DD that you will not bail her out, ever. If she ends up bankrupt, she can sleep in your spare bedroom, but you won't pay for anything for her.

I told my kids that we would pay for college, and after that, they are 100% on their own. They are always welcome to live at home (none of them chose that option), but we would not pay for anything, nor would we bail them out if they got into financial trouble. We do pay half of their airfare when they come home because want them to visit us, and we give them gifts for holidays and birthday, but never money!! We ask if there's something they need, and give them that.

I have a friend who's been bailed out by her wealthy mom for her entire life. It's infantalizing. She's never truly grown up. [/quote]

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