Reply to My sister's husband is the best and yep, I am envious

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

How do some women have all the luck! Do they cast a spell![/quote]

It's not luck, and no one is casting any spells. It's being selective. My DH is the most amazing person I've ever met. Twenty years of a better life than I ever could have imagined. I dated some jerks for sure -- I knew better than to marry them. People need to hold out. [/quote]
This! My parents told me not to settle and I didn't that was some of the best advice they gave me.[/quote]
I think there's a difference between "settle" and "reasonable".  There are only so many men out there who are everything.

DH is all that OP wrote except he has kind of a big belly.  But, he rubs my feet, cooks dinner (most nights), involved with kids, helped coach their team, cooks Thanksgiving meals for my family who joins us, etc...  He's a good enough looking guy, but has a pretty big belly. I think it's somewhat genetic. His dad also had a belly even though neither are big elsewhere.

Contrast to my sister who married the "good looking" guy with no belly, but who was a lazy ahole. They divorced.

I did hold out until I found a guy that was a keeper, but the guy I dated beforehand was much better looking all around, but I knew he wasn't go to be a good life partner.[/quote]

I like your thinking but "reasonable" isn't a verb. I wish there were different words for settling on the superficial things and settling on the fundamentals. Settling on the superficial things is something almost everybody is going to do because, well, like attracts like and whoever we marry is likely to be settling on some superficial things as well. Of course it shouldn't feel like settling (I think of the wisdom of Elizabeth Bennett refusing Mr. Darcy's first marriage proposal while accepting his second), but we should be open to dating people who aren't the tall dark and handsome princes we fantasized about. We should not be open to dating people who don't treat us well, are lazy, are entitled, are mean to service workers, who have secret instagram accounts exclusively for posting heart emoji on bikini model's photos, etc. (that last one is tongue in cheek, but I do think that if you marry a guy like that you have to anticipate a good amount of objectification and eye wandering)[/quote]

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