Reply to How worried to be about birth defects with advanced maternal age?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had mine at 35 and 38. You do the blood test at 8-10 weeks and then the scan at 11-13 and it gives you an idea. You can’t screen for autism which is a big deal imo. Sounds like a third isn’t for you. [/quote]

+1 I had mine at the same ages. With my first, at 35, there was no cell-free DNA blood test available yet and the 12 week scan showed a slightly large nuchal fold, so we had an amnio and additional monitoring through the third trimester. DS was healthy, but it was an incredibly anxious time. With my 2nd, we had all the early blood tests, great scans, non stress tests in the weeks leading up to her birth. Everything looked great, easy pregnancy, healthy baby. She does have ASD, diagnosed at age 4. She's a lovely kid and is doing well (in some ways better than our older NT kid, to be honest!), but of course DH and I wonder if our ages contributed to her ASD. We have zero regrets but we also decided not to have another child, even though we originally wanted three.

I know it's very typical in this area to have kids in mid-late 30s and beyond. Statistics and anecdotal evidence are still strongly on your side! But there are people for whom statistics will not be on their side, and will receive an unfavorable diagnosis. Will your marriage and existing family be able to weather it if you decide to terminate or need to manage a child with special needs? Life is a crapshoot. Loss and change can happen at any age, it's really the question you ask yourself when you consider parenting to begin with, but it becomes more statistically relevant the older you are. We asked the question before DS1 and DD2, and then after DD2 when we asked the question again we knew the answer would be no, and we were going to be a family of 4.[/quote]

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