Reply to 12yo shared inappropriate joke

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, my much younger daughter came home the other day and said that another girl had made a joking comment about another girl’s skin and the second girl got incredibly upset and called her a racist. My add is too young to be a reliable narrator but from what she repeated it did not sound maliciously intended. We discussed that there has been a history of people being cruel to black people in this country and particularly a history of cruelty based on the color of their skin. We already have a policy of not commenting on other people’s appearance (necessary because she used to like to tell people they had a big belly like the dad in Peppa pig) but I hope to add additional context over the years. Anyway I would be sure you are making the bigger point that it’s not about THIS joke but that many jokes about minority groups are based on hatred or prejudice and in general should not be repeated whether you think they are fine or not. I would have thought a 12 year old would know that but again my kids are younger so I don’t really know. I completely agree with the suggestions to make his consequences related to understanding why his comment was offensive and why what the Jewish people have been through but I’d really spell out the issues here very clearly and very generally in case he’s not picking up on some of these social lessons that he should be getting in school etc.[/quote]

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