Reply to Is it okay to take a break from a friend without telling them?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I need a break from this person. She doesn’t understand other people’s POV so I doubt she’s going to be receptive to a conversation. Over the last week, I’ve been ignoring her calls and texts. I will “thumbs up” or “laugh react” over text but that’s about it. She has called me over 25 times in the past 3 days and texts me asking when I can call her back. I have replied that I’m extremely busy this week (and I am!).

Is it okay to pull away from a friendship without explicitly telling the person that’s what you’re doing?

Fwiw: I just need like a few weeks without her constantly calling and texting me. I’m not ghosting her and it’s not going to be forever. I just need to get my bearings in my own life right now. [/quote]

What you're doing is immature.  Tell her you aren't feeling well and need to rest a few days and will circle back when you're better.  Thumbs up only is basically ghosting.  [/quote]

PP, I am busy. Today she has been nonstop calling, texting and otherwise trying to get my attention. She wants to talk to me about credit card offers (per her last slew of texts ) and she has been sending me links about a local news story. I run a small home based business and told her at the beginning of the week that this was going to be a hellish week. I am slammed with orders. This is a person who always manages to bait an argument so I don't really want to talk to her right now since I have 50 other things going on right now. She just texted me again and said, "I'm going to call you again at 5, be near your phone". I replied that I likely won't as I won't be done with these orders until midnight at the earliest. She replied that she just wants to talk for "like 20 mins".

I just can't engage right now.[/quote]

DP - you have plenty of time to post and re-post on here, so you can't be that busy.

You're also not following any of the good advice you've been given, not on this thread or on the dinner party thread.  So, you're just as much of the problem as she is, at this point.[/quote]

Yes, I have time to eat lunch, and take bathroom breaks, and go to the supply store... but I don't have time (or bandwidth) for her histrionics.

And I have taken the advice. I've set boundaries: told her early in the week whats going on, told her I would call her back on X day, replied to her messages sporadically. The biggest boundary I've set is not dropping everything to answer her calls anymore. If I'm on the couch and feel like talking, I'll answer, but I'm no longer prioritizing conversations with her. [/quote]

If you're still posting as many complaints about her as you have been in the last, what, three hours, you haven't set firm enough boundaries.  The point of boundaries is to be able to engage with the person in way that lets you preserve the relationship without staying resentful or frustrated or whatever.  If the boundaries you set were working, you wouldn't be complaining.

So: why haven't you blocked her number, or at the very least silenced text notifications?[/quote]

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