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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Long story short, he reads well above his grade level and have some niche interests that he'll happily discuss with adults all day long. No Asperger's or anything, just a kid who loves to read and loves discussing what he's learned with people who get it, which most of his peers do not. E.g., last month we hired a fishing charter, and he spent most of the time talking to the captain about barques vs. brigantines. Or he'll chat up the poor deadheading pilot next to him on the plane about what kind of approach he thinks we might be flying in this weather. We've had long discussions about how adults usually want quiet and he needs to be very aware for hints they're done talking, but it doesn't seem to be sticking. "But my friends don't know anything about things like this." [b]He will stop talking to someone who appears to be done[/b], but next time he runs across an adult who seems like they might know something about something he's into, he strikes up a conversation again. He's only 10, and [b]adults hate it[/b]. Any advice?[/quote]

These two seem like opposites to me.

Some people are more social than others. If he's talking to an adult, then stopping when they appear bored or done, then striking up another conversation with another adult, that sounds totally fine? And actually pretty advanced for his age? I do feel like most smart, oldest kids I know go through a phase like this right around 10, but if he's actually watching cues and cutting off when the adult is bored or sending signals he's done, then that all sounds great. And if you're watching from the sidelines thinking "I would hate this"... well that's a you problem.

If, however, the other adults are showing signs that THEY hate it - you can help provide the adult with an opportunity to move on. You can insert yourself and redirect him. Or you can insert an opportunity for that person to step away "I'm sure this man needs to focus on driving the boat" that also gives the boat driver a chance to say "oh, nah, we're on cruise control, here let me show you this lever" or whatever. You should also talk to him about being aware when a person is "trapped" - if you're at a party, it's easier for someone to make excuses and walk over to the snack table, if you're on a plane, the person you're talking to is somewhat trapped and you need to lean more on the side of shutting up.

So which of those bolded options this actually is sounds like a critical difference.[/quote]

Ok, truthfully, I don't know if they hate it. I'm not a kid person, and I would hate it, so I'm making a lot of assumptions. I mean...don't most adults hate talking to kids? Especially ones who don't act their age?[/quote]

Many of them do hate it, op. Of course they do!

Even if it’s a “shared” interest. Say I, a grown up woman, am an avid spelunker. unless I’m teaching your child spelunking I would be happy to exchange two sentences with a 10 year old about spelunking on a plane but beyond that I’d be nodding along and wishing you would get a handle on sir talksalot. Especially if he “knew a lot about it.” [/quote]

So use your words and tell the kid you’d like to read your book/take a nap/watch a movie.

So many awkward adults, the kid isn’t the issue.[/quote]

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