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[quote=Anonymous]Another no way person here.  I wasn't caught.  Affair person was an old boyfriend.  It was a long-distance thing, mostly emotional, only "actually" cheated once (I am distinguishing from emotional cheating, which I was doing in spades).  Turned out old BF was as much of a disaster as I thought in my clear-eyed moments, except since he dumped me all those years ago I always wondered if really I wasn't good enough.  At least I got that answered.

It also made me look hard at my marriage and take the steps necessary to end it.  It is true that I cheated because things were miserable, but I am NOT saying that was all DH's fault.  When I started acting like I didn't care if we did divorce, DH responded. He changed some things, I changed some things, and now we are better than ever.  No, as far as I know he doesn't know, and honestly, if he was cheating then (as I sometimes suspected) or had a porn habit or whatever, I don't want to know either.  That wasn't us.  It was really painful to go through fixing all the bad stuff.  Only several years later was I able to finally admit the pain was worth getting to where we are now.

I've got the guy I want now, and I don't need anyone else.[/quote]

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