Reply to S/O Losing respect for friend who is on her second (that I know of) affair

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Reply to "S/O Losing respect for friend who is on her second (that I know of) affair"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm shocked at the number of people that give up on friendships here.  I mean, you can choose not make new crazy friends, but I would never give up on a friend I've had since childhood.  That's just as bad a character flaw as having an affair in my book. If your friend is really hurting and damaged and you were really her friend then I would try to help.  [/quote]

Sometimes helping is enabling though. Doing the work of a good friend means listening, supporting, and also pushing back and gently helping your friend realize when they are going down a bad path, or at least what you percieve is a bad path. But it sounds like this woman is delusional. Sometimes it takes losing everything and hitting rock bottom to snap out of it and make real changes to becoming a better person.

A true friend may bail at this stage, as long as she comes back with this woman loses everything (if that happens). I don't get the feeling this woman will change until some shit hits the fan, and that hasn't happened yet. If it does, OP can always help her pick up the pieces, but staying around now does seem like it is enabling and causing stress to OP. Who wants to be in on an affair? Doesn't a good friend care about her friend's husband and children? Maybe ditching her now means she is looking out for them.[/quote]

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