Reply to Anyone else realize how crappy their own mother was once you became a mother yourself?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes. My kids are 16 and 21 so we’ve been through most of the child rearing stuff and challenges. I can’t wrap my mind around the horrible things my mom said to me year after year, things I would never say to mine no matter how much they’re driving me bonkers. Fortunately I had a great dad. I really love and value my relationship with kids, and am glad our connection is loving and respectful.[/quote]

Yes. My therapist thinks my mother might actually be a sadist. When I was seven I had a horrendous overbite (like Laura on little house on the prairie) and my mother nicknamed me Beaver Teeth and called me that in public and encouraged others to call me that too. I didn’t open my
Mouth in public for like five years. I can’t even imagine doing something that cruel, can you? Just why?[/quote]

My sister had a particular dental issue that my mother always pointed out in others to say how unattractive it was. My sister never mentioned it but even as a kid I thought, wtf lady, why would you say that??? My mother, as I learned as an adult, is absolutely a sadist. A cruel and hateful person. No doubt about it because I am basing that on what I experienced as an adult, not memories from childhood.

But the terrible thing is, I have said very hurtful and damaging things to my own kids over the years. I didn't do it to be sadistic -- I'm not a sadist at all -- I said them in the heat of an argument. Is that any better? I hope so. My kids think not though.[/quote]

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