Reply to Do you reserve the right to check your college kids’ texts if you’re paying the phone bill?

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Reply to "Do you reserve the right to check your college kids’ texts if you’re paying the phone bill?"

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[quote=Anonymous]look, I'm not a mom in the DC area and i ended up here from a list of "lol look this this list of funny niche forums" someone posted, so this may be WAY out of line and someone needs to ban me:

This thread hit me hard because I've had college aged friends in the area & similar wealthy areas of the US with mental issues and parents that would take their phones and search all their stuff, etc

They were in college and their mom would steal their phone and read their texts because of the suicide risk (and a dozen other reasons but she loved to use mental health to justify it), but why was there a suicide risk???

Is it because of having a neurotic mother that "checks" on them every 30 minutes since the cradle? Because of having a father that sees their child as an "investment" and not a human being?

The "answer my texts" "where are you" "where are you" "hey, answer my texts" parents, the life 360 gps stalker parents, the "I pay for your roof be grateful" parents, the "food you eat is mine i just let you eat it" parents, the "I pay your tuition and planned your life so you belong to me forever" parent.

the parents that make you think you'd rather be dead than have to be "grateful" anymore because gratefulness to them is not true gratefulness, but a demand of compliance and subservience.

Real gratefulness is like happy and free rushing water in the heart, you can encourage it by example, but one can't demand it.

one of my friends got clean from both substance abuse and suicidality by running far, far, away (and nearly becoming homeless) and he does not answer the phone very often when family calls

Sadly, he's scared to accept gifts or rely on others because he always thinks there is strings attached because of how he was raised, he cannot seem to believe anything is really his, or "safe" unless he bought it with his own money.

His family would always throw anything they gave to him into his face, if he does not do what they want. (All those tutors for NOTHING!) Or buy things for him as an excuse to control that resource.

How sad it is not to know a true gift!

(this reply is not directed at anyone specific here, I promise)[/quote]

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