Reply to “It’s hard to find masculine men who aren’t conservatives”

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
This is kind of a shrug to me. Not a useful discussion. It equates "masculinity" with specific actions that are not especially important. Who pays for the first date just isn't that big a thing. I very briefly dated a guy who paid for EVERYthing to the point it quickly felt condescending and show-offy, and he wasn't my idea of masculine at all. The most masculine man I know now is also extremely liberal politically and personally. But I don't define "masculine" in terms of "pays for things, holds the door for the woman (only?), 'providing for' the woman." [/quote]

Exactly this. Paying for dates or going to work while I stay home is not masculinity. To me, masculinity means that I feel safe physically and emotionally in a man's presence. That he would stand up for me and protect me if I was being mistreated. In a partnership especially, it's the ability to have insight into my needs and the confidence to take care of them.

I can't say conservative men typically meet this bar.[/quote]

Well said!  Although, I think your description is applicable to 'partners' in general and not just a masculine (or feminine) trait.  Whether someone is 'masculine' enough for me is more about whether I'm attracted to them or not - and there are multiple layers to attraction.  But, I definitely agree that paying for stuff and opening doors is definitely not one of the layers. [/quote]

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