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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Agree with your husband.  Buy noise canceling headphones for your daughter, encourage self advocacy and[b] make sure she knows she can retreat to your own bedroom if she needs some space to regroup.  [/b]Part of growing up is learning to adjust to others and also learning how to speak up for your own needs, and age 11 isn’t too young for that in this kind of low stakes situation.[/quote]

This is good advice.

Give your DD chances to take some space from her cousin.  Plan some outings without the cousin (maybe just and you and DD) and give your daughter some gentle language to use with the 9 year old.

It's also ok to say "hey 9YO, Larla needs some quiet time right now, why don't you come help me with this puzzle/go on a walk/play this game with me?".  But if your solution is for the 9YO to suddenly figure this out, that's not going to work.  You need to be kind and direct when she has to leave the 11 YO alone.  Don't wait for her to "get the hint".  She's 9.  She needs direction.[/quote]

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