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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, you're still being a control freak and not understanding what it means for them to make their own decisions and live the they want. It really has nothing to do with you as long as you stop trying to control them. It's really what it comes down to. You don't like to see it, you want them to be living the way you envision and you're furious. Move on with your life. Talk to them once a week or so. My controlling sister made my parents move into an assisted living near her. Then she dropped dead 3 months in. My dad died 6 months after that. Now my mom lives by herself, in ths place where she knows nobody. Rapidly deteriorating dementia. But she will probably live this way for 10 more years. And for what? She's miserable. I can't see but once or month or so, at best. Why live in nursing homes into your 90s when life that way sucks. Stick it out at home and die 10 years earlier, on your own terms. That's the way I see it. But guess what, I only have to worry about how I want to age. [/quote]

Because by leaving them to suffer and die  horribly is actually abuse. They are delusional, whether or not it matters. She doesn't have to care for them,  but they will be in a Medicaid facility,  they will take the assets ( probably the biggest concern because they will wipe out any and all of the estate) and they will die there because many of these places are really really bad. 
Medicare will pay for up to 90 days after a 3 day hospitalization,  but that is  it.  [/quote]

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