Reply to How to handle: Terminally ill neighbor, helping with kid who is crossing several lines

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[quote=Anonymous]I think you still keep bringing meals to them, mowing their lawn for them, things like that. But nothing involving their daughter. Tell the mom you are very sorry that it has come to this but you can no longer have their daughter over to your house or carpool with her because she has been incredibly mean/a bully to your DD and that the latest text message calling your daughter a slut has your daughter very upset and that you just cannot continue having the girls around each other because it is damaging to your daughter. Tell her you still want to be there for her in every way you can but that she does need to find someone else to help out with her daughter.

I think you have to tell the mom what's going on or she'll think you're just ghosting her because you're tired of helping out or something and that would be more hurtful than telling the truth. Maybe she already knows her daughter has been mean to yours and just thought it must not be *that* bad since you haven't said anything about it. Maybe she is so overwhelmed with everything she's going through that she truly has no idea what's going on with her daughter and perhaps this will actually help the daughter as the mom might see it as a cry for help from her daughter like the daughter needs therapy or something. Either way, it's incredibly tragic what they're going through and I know you want to be a good friend/neighbor through it (and you have been) but you cannot help them at the expense of your daughter's mental health/well being.[/quote]

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