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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your pros focus mostly on your lifestyle and not your relationship itself.  Just want to point that out.[/quote]

Yep, there is no relationship at this point, there is friendship/ respect. No desire or romance as of lately. I would prefer that change, but all energy is on himself and being “happy” - which for him, does not include a romantic relationship. [/quote]

I have not dealt with this, but the reality is this behavior is super selfish. I find it hard to believe his therapist is really encouraging only “sole” focus and nothing for the two of you as a couple. I’m very sorry you are dealing with this. There is a way to strike a balance between activities as an individual and activities as a couple.[/quote]

I don’t see this as selfish at all.  Their kid is high school age and doesn’t need them the way little kids do. When that time comes, as parents we have to develop new interests and things to fill our time. Four hours working out a week is nothing - most people I know spend far more, especially if you consider commuting time to and from the gym. Personal interests are also good to have - just because you’re part of a couple doesn’t mean everything needs to be together.

The only problems I see here are that OP and her DH have not yet figured out what their new common interests are and they apparently haven’t rekindled their pre kid common interests. Also it doesn’t seem like OP has built her own new life in the wake of the independence of having all of your kids in HS brings. [/quote]

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