Reply to Stay in a blah marriage for the kid?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am divorced and would absolutely not divorce over this. For those saying “is the model of marriage you want your child to learn from” that is so bogus. Yes. You want her to learn that it is a lifelong commitment not something you leave bc you’re bored or underwhelmed. It is tilting at windmills to think you’re going to get the perfect marriage on the third try as a double divorced with a young child in tow, it will not happen. You married for life and meant it. See it through and find other outlets (not adulterous) to feel more fulfilled.[/quote]

+100 op you should not be embarrassed about your first divorce in the slightest but the stats for a third marriage are very very poor. That may sound harsh but it’s just realistic to say that it’s unlikely you’re third marriage would have some magic your others didn’t have. So to blow up you and your kids life with a good, nice guy. It just makes no sense.

Go to counseling to figure out if your expectations of marriage are playing a part in this. Try to figure out your role. You talked a lot about your husband and his flaws and didn’t mention how you are or aren’t meeting his needs which in hindsight is worth considering.

Teach your daughter that life and partnership are bigger than your own individual needs/wants. That a great relationship weathers difficult times, that each person is accountable for their piece and stays committed to being together and figuring it out.

I remember that quote from a couple married like 70 years - what is the secret to a long marriage? Don’t get divorced. [/quote]

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