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[quote=Anonymous]I really think she means well. But she places much higher value on social capital. She says for the kids and for their own rise in the social standings, which I get. But I still lean more toward teaching them to lean on a crutch like simply writing down the lyrics to a song to help calm down like I did in JHS.

There is a balance where these crutches are rude and socially awkward and that can be the problem. I counter with you have to measure that with the environment and the expectation and outcome. If solving a Rubik's cube helps me before a family function, then what's the harm? And its a novelty. If he's going to just sit in the corner and solve and not be social then that's a problem.

I try and be social, but I make dumb mistakes and instead of cursing or getting angry or wanting to leave, I'll try to get something to help me relax my anxiety, but she thinks these things are rude.

I think the balance is that I'm saying that any pulling out of my phone is not allowed (by her) and she's saying that all I'm going to do is is sit in the corner on my phone / doing puzzles / writing / whatever.

I am not observant of my own behavior, I only know my emotions and how nervous I am in these settings. So when she points out that I was rude it stings because I'm reminded of how nervous I was and she ignores that and I try to remind her but she ignores that because its irrelevant. Or maybe not, we'll see. [/quote]

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