Reply to Parent doesnt drive and won't move

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well at 70, she’s not going to learn how to drive.  As with everything if you can’t/won’t do it yourself, you have to outsource.  You say the plumber took advantage of her.  She did what needed to be done.  Plumbers charge for going out on a service call.  $60 doesn’t sound bad at all.  If she went without Internet/tv for 2 weeks, then she made do.  It sounds like it’s not what you would have done, but she made it work.  Unless she called you every day asking you to fix the issue?  As for getting around, it’s a good thing Uber exists.  She can get to where ever she needs to without relying on family and friends.

If all this boils down to your parent wants you to be available for them and you’re not because of your other responsibilities then say that.  The choice is either the parent moves closer to you or does without your help.  If she’s still working, then it doesn’t sound like there are any cognitive issues.  She may not like your boundaries but she will understand what you are saying.  You just need to hold fast to them.[/quote]

Yes. She definitely called everyday complaining about the issue, though recognized that I wasn't in a position to fix it.

[b]I appreciate your emphasis regarding boundaries. That's been my approach. It just doesn't always feel good.[/b][/quote]

DP - setting boundaries rarely feels good in the moment, nor is it supposed to.  It’s a longer-term approach that allows you to maintain the relationship without resentment or losing yourself entirely.  You have to prioritize your well-being and that of your nuclear family.  Plenty of people won’t like that, plenty of people will think it’s selfish.  That doesn’t mean they’re right.[/quote]

Thank you![/quote]

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