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[quote=Anonymous]Dear OP.
I feel your distress.  Our daughter, 11, sounds so much like your son. The lying and stealing has been going on for approx 3 years.  She has been in weekly therapy for 2.5 years and sees a child psychiatrist for a Ritalin Rx quarterly.   The Ritalin has helped the impulse control and the stealing has subsided but the lying is still daily.  She lies to everyone, teachers, friends, therapists.   Basically, she does whatever the heck she wants to do, even though she knows it is wrong.   She isn't mean or hurtful, she just does what she wants and if she doesn't feel like  doing something she is supposed to do, she doesn't do it.  She is a headache for teachers and she is never invited to playdates or sleepovers because other parents know her MO. We have tried everything in the book.  I am ashamed to admit that after 2 years with no improvement, we've even spanked her as a last resort in the hopes that it would shake her into realising how her choices affect others.  We are at our witts end as it has been so long without a whole lot of improvement. Every day it is something.  Every single day. We try not to sweat the small stuff but 90% of her choices must be addressed.

She has been suspended from school once for a day for stealing and lying about it.  I was relieved at the time, thinking it would embarrass her into improvement, but she continues with her stubborn ways.  She has written apology notes to all of her teachers and she knows lying and being sneaky is wrong but it continues.

Her daily lies and choices make it hard to ever have a nice, family day because we are always addressing something. It isn't fair to any of us.  We feel like crappy parents.  Our other kids are really good kids. We are totally stumped. It isn't easy.

I wish I had a solution to share.   Just know you have company in your boat.   Best to you. [/quote]

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