Reply to Kindergartener having poop accidents

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[quote=Anonymous]OP my son did this. Was perfectly potty trained and then started pooping his pants. I went through ALOT of bad advice from highly tauted experts in this area.

Step 1 is always tonrule out encopresis, and for this don't bother with your pediatrician.  Go to a pediatric gastroenterologist.  I recommend Children's Hospital.  We went to a private practitioner first who had an x ray done.  She looked at the xray and said "oh yes, you can see the stool blockage right here." Then put him on miralax for months. For this, she made a ton of money in office visits from us over many months.
When nothing changed I took him to children's where the doctor gave him a suppository and waited a few minutes. He didn't poop the table so the doctor said if there was a blockage, or he was holding, the suppository would have made him go immediately.

So then we went on to therapists who gave him more useless talk therapy and potty charts. (Like we never tried this???) AND took months more of our money for no effect.

Every message board I came across said it was 1. In boys 2. Often very high functioning autistic boys 3. Nothing they tried worked and it suddenly resolved itself as the boy reached puberty.

Here's my perspectives. 
1. Your husband isn't helpful,  has a very poor understanding of his child.
2. Mom you're on the right track but don't absorb this as a burden you can necessarily fix. This will cause you to become angry with DS.
3. Don't make him clean it up. Boy a ton of cheap and second hand underwear and throw it away. Have him shower after it happens to get clean. 
I strongly suspect it's a combination of lack of Social perspective (not understanding or being embarrassed by it and not understanding that people can smell it. No matter how many times you demonstrate that it can be smelled a mile away, he isn't going to get it. Introspection problems. Not listening to his body telling him how it feels. My ds still can go the entire day without drinking any water. And sometimes food. Adhd- being focused on other things and not wanting to stop.  But I also think part of it has to do with their testes development.  The reason I think this is because they suddenly stop doing it near puberty when their testes begin to enlarge. I understand people will think this is crazy and baseless but there is some connection between the age and the time it stops.

Please try to understand he really isn't doing it on purpose and be patient. It's going to be hell and embarras you to death. 
Try your best to get him on a wake up pooping schedule.  Eating triggers the urge to evacuate so give him breakfast early enough that he will sit on the potty and poop before school. A tiny dose of laxative over spring break on schedule might help move him onto the AM pooping.[/quote]

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