Reply to "You should have another kid"

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Reply to ""You should have another kid""

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had a second child 5 years after the birth of my first with special needs, in part because I realized I would be intensely miserable if all I ever was, was the parent of a SN child. It may seem selfish, but since I'd always wanted kids, I thought I deserved a chance to have a normal child-raising experience. So we rolled the dice and won the lottery. Our oldest has taught all of us in the family humility and resilience when dealing with daily mental and physical illness. And our second has shown us how joyful and worry-free parenting a neurotypical child can be.

If any of you are hesitating, I just wanted to relay my experience. Perhaps some of the people closest to you who have asked you this question have this concern in the back of their mind, but can't quite articulate it.[/quote]

OP here. I don’t mean to pick on you but I’m going to because what you said is a perfect example. YOU rolled the dice and got lucky. I’m happy for it.  However, you are in the group of people who are likely tell me that at age 49 I should just have another kid.

The moms I know who have TWO special needs kids never need to “relay their experience” to me. [/quote]

I have three kids with special needs, and I think having three kids means I can’t get too miserable or down about it any one of them.

I’m not saying it’s wine and roses over here, but I love my kids and am so thankful we have a large family.

One of my kids has pretty severe ADHD (among other things) and there have been times where she doesn’t have many (any?) friends. But her siblings love her and play with her, and came back to play even when she said mean things because they know she loves them and will apologize or give a hug later. So I am also glad they have one another.

That doesn’t meant you should have a large family - you should have whatever size you want - but not all of us mean “have more NT kids” when we tell you it’s a joy to have more kids. 
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