Reply to if you or your spouse cheated- how did you tell the kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My children were young (both elementary school) but I didn't tell them. The older one, now 11 has asked some probing questions, as ex-DH introduced them to AP band moved in with her long before divorce was final. I will not come forward and unnecessarily ruin their image of their father. He is sadly, doing a pretty good job of that himself, as his priorities continued to be skewed.

I have had lots of conversations with my therapist about this - ultimately if one of my children asks point blank if their Dad cheated, I will tell them yes. Having 1 parent who lies is bad enough; to have a child find out both of their parents are liars is devastating.[/quote]

This. I am a child in this situation and I absolutely do consider myself to be betrayed. I was devastated to learn that my mother has been lying to all of us (for example about her whereabouts) and a lie is a lie no matter what it's about. I lost respect for her and it will never be the same. I lost my friendships with her AP's children. My father has always been honest with me and I appreciate it. Better only one liar as a parent than two.[/quote]

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