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[quote=Anonymous]There is a big difference between whether it's a loving parent or family member who is appreciative when you are there for him/her and who has self-awareness and empathy or a selfish person who feels you feels entitled to you dealing with the fallout and expresses no gratitude.

My dad made some poor choices and lived in denial, but he was kind and gracious with me so I was there for throughout his decline and I feel no resentment, just love for him.

My mother made poor choices despite having money and time and is entitled, ungrateful and sometimes downright abusive when i have helped. When I developed my own health issues I had to turn things over to professionals who are trained to deal with highly difficult older folks.

Have a brother with heart and blood pressure issues. He was told to make lifestyle changes and get help for his anger. (He takes after mom). Instead he continues to be a work-a-haulic in a job where he could change hours and he already has enough money to retire in luxury. he continues to get in trouble at work for his explosive temper. He continues to get into frivolous lawsuits outside of work even though they seem to lead to health emergencies. I don't blame my SIL for wanting a divorce and I cannot be there for him for any more emergencies when he refuses to make any changes including getting therapy for anger management.[/quote]

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