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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There is a fine line between keeping exact accounts and insisting on everyone contributing/ not freeloading, and just being a complete arse about it.

From your post, I'm not sure how often your brothers cross the line. They likely have expenses commensurate with their income, and are allergic to anyone making assumptions about what they can contribute solely based on their income. Likely they're of the mindset that "they worked hard to get where they are, and if others didn't work as hard, then too bad for them". Conveniently ignoring that being white and male opens doors that others have to work hard to open, and that everything has a component of luck.

I've seen both sides in my family. Well-off people being milked by poorer relatives who assume they can afford to help in every circumstance, and people getting overly defensive about their wealth to protect themselves from that same problem.

Continue to defend your financial interests, OP. This is a transactional negotiation: they play hardball, you play hardball.

[/quote]

that makes sense. these are small amounts of money though - they seem to expend MUCH more time and energy devising ways to control their contributions than just writing a check would take. it made sense if they were like us mere mortals and still had to pinch to save for college. but ha ha no! they actually have generational wealth now. [/quote]

There is nothing wrong in controlling your own contribution.  You sound very bitter. [/quote]

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