Reply to Problems with my four year old. I need a super nanny.

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[quote=Anonymous]I would love to help you with this!

1. Your kid has been alive for only 4 years and has no control over his circumstances. 
2. He doesn’t owe you anything, and can’t communicate complex feelings. Think about how you feel when things are out of control, you are hungry and tired. You feel this way about your child! 
3. You can change what you do, and the wonderful thing about kids is he will change in response.

So…..read two books: how to talk so your little kid will listen, and then the explosive Child.

While reading those sit your kid down and tell them you think they are trying really hard but the family routine isn’t working and you want them to help fix it. 
Listen to them! Ask them questions - is there a time when they would like to get dressed? Take a bath? 
Have a snack?

Then redo some timing - try to offer the things that help proactively instead of in defeat.  - if he is grabbing food before dinner put on a show in a space he likes - could be at the table with a laptop, or on the couch - and give him a pre dinner snack of carrot sticks, apples, frozen peas, celery, really whatever veggies/fruits he likes. If he loves cheese cut up some slices. Ypu pick what will add or replace a piece of his dinner. And then you can praise him for hanging calmly while you fix dinner. When you sit down to eat with him make it short and sweet.

And dressing- maybe it will be easier to take a fun bath while you read a book to him and then put school clothes on at night. 
It’s not traditional, but lots of kids can do that in the evening but not in the morning. If he’s wrinkles so what? If he can be calm and happy you are so successful!

Again he is 4 - the most important thing you can teach him is to be kind and problem solve, and to keep trying new things.

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