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[quote=Anonymous]Our experience is your loved one is better off in a facility where you visit and then if needed maybe hire a personal aide down the line.

Alone in a home the lonliness and nutty behavior increased. Grandma became enmeshed with a provider who played into her neediness. All seemed fine when we visited. Then  the provider started telling sob stories to get money. The first time it was noticed grandma wrote a check, we let it go and told the provider not to do it again, but because she was so good to grandma it would be seen as a bonus. (Grandma was difficult so it was hard to find someone willing to deal). Then things got really disturbing. long story short when there are witnesses around this is less likely to happen. Also, grandma aged backward once she had to interact with her peers who wouldn't put up with her BS. It was tough at first, but eventually she made friends and got a new lease on life.

Sure the facilities are understaffed. Think of it like when you send your kid to daycare. It's understaffed. Things will go wrong. The people are underpaid and you need to reward the good ones. Your kid may be miserable at first. Your difficult kid may be angry and sit in a corner, but then...over time you see why they must be with peers-more smiling, more engagement, a new lease on life. The activities and outings bring excitement. [/quote]

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