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Reply to "Disciplining the undisciplinable - HELP me with my 4yo DD"

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[quote=Anonymous]Hey OP, lots of sympathy for you but also, don’t despair. I have an intense, anxious, smart kid who was explosive pretty much from birth to age 7 and at age 9 he still struggles with anxiety but the explosiveness has calmed down so much. He is in therapy and his therapist agrees…there is nothing going on here except the fact that some kids really are just wired to be intense and sensitive. This is what I want to tell you—Age four was the absolute WORST. I didn’t think I would get through that year. Very similar behavior to what you describe. So, so hard.

You are doing a ton of things right but don’t expect yourself to be perfect. Sometimes you will get upset and that is  actually an appropriate reaction. They need to know their actions impact others. Of course remaining calm as much as possible is ideal but guess what, you’re human. Honestly, you sound like a great parent.

I found it really helpful to read up on intense kids, including the old classic “Raising your spirited child” which just helps affirm your experiences and gives some helpful framing and tools. Therapy helps too ( for me and for DS) but he didn’t start till more like age 8.

It’s not easy but you will get through it. Hugs to you OP! [/quote]

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