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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For much of my family, who I have seen evolve since my own coming out almost 20 (!!) years ago- the evolution has been one of having me and my partner (now wife) in their lives. Watching us mature as a couple, decide to have kids, and on and on. When I told my uncle that I have no legal relationship to my sons he was LIVID. But it's true. I can't adopt in this state and we can't afford to move. When I explain that if one of us dies the other will have no rights to their social security, or retirement income, and in fact will have to pay estate taxes- he again gets so angry. This is not a liberal man, but he sees that this is unfair. I live in a state that's contituiton vaguely prohibits me from entering into "any contract that confers the rights of marriage." Does that mean that my power of attorney is invalid too?

Marriage does some big things- it solidifies a commitment between two adults and asks them to make some pretty important promises to one another. My wife and I didn't need the government for that- our family and friends were enough.

It also does myriad little things like making it easy to visit in the hospital or put someone on your insurance. It lets your spouse have access to accounts and treats your common property as such. It's those things I need. I have a marriage. [/quote]

I finally get it, PP. I am pro-gay marriage, and always have been. But I have to admit that as a straight person I never really grasped what not being able to officially marry meant. I've always thought it is unfair, but that there are legal ways (adoption, power of attorney) etc. around some of the barriers to an unmarried gay couple living as a married couple. I finally understand- it's like adapting new "safety regulations" for abortion clinics that detail how wide the hallways must be. You've had a marriage all along- and denying you the little things isn't going to stop you. It's just offensive, discriminatory, and infuriating. And it's like people who are anti-gay marriage are sticking their heads in the sand pretending like this will stop you. [/quote]

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