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[quote=Anonymous]My ILs pay for private school. They have used money (in the past) as a way to push us to do things they want - pay for vacations, down payment on a house, etc. You are correct that you do feel some sense of obligation even if they aren’t jerks about it.

That being said, if you are in the DC area, private schools tuition for independent schools is $40-52K and increases each year by 3-6% or so. So by declining tuition aid from pre-K-12, it’s a more than $1M gift from your parents.

I actually think that it is your parents, it’s your job to set boundaries, and you should have a primary voice on accepting this gift. However, that also means that you need to be able to step in and set boundaries if you do.

No one here would tell you to mix your inheritance with marital assets, because those are funds your parents intend for you. This is a gift your parents are giving to you, as well. Certainly your husband has an equal voice in deciding where your kids go to school, but he shouldn’t really have a voice in declining this  significant gift - if nothing else it will provide your children with additional inheritance from the two of you. [/quote]

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