Reply to Mom is upset we no longer want to use her middle name for our daughter

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here,

I totally acknowledge that it must be disappointing for my mom to learn that we are considering changing my daughter’s middle name after we already picked it. I’m also aware that we shouldn’t have announced her name until after her birth. This is our first baby and we have definitely learned our lesson! I always wondered why people waited— now I understand.

I just feel like my mom hasn’t been deserving. We have a very complicated relationship and it was probably (definitely) a mistake to tell her we were using her name. She has just been terrible throughout my pregnancy. She is a narcissist and my therapist suggested that perhaps she’s afraid of losing some control or power. [/quote]

OP, I'm sorry your mom has been awful to you, but you've known her your whole life, so saying she's not deserving AFTER telling her you were using the name is 100% on you. It's a separate issue than whether she's a narcissist or whatever.  [/quote]

Your mom may or may not be a narcissist, but the person who is 100% responsible for this particular drama is you. I hope you’ll discuss it with your therapist.[/quote]

+1. You laid the groundwork for mom to fail on this one.[/quote]

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