Reply to Would leaving my job to SAH be crazy?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here - thank you all for confirming that it would indeed be crazy for me to leave the work force! I know I should try another job before just giving it all up to SAH, and I’m sure that’s what I’ll do. It’s just been a tough few months!

As for all the questions about why DH doesn’t stay home instead, we haven’t seriously discussed it. DH enjoys his job, while I am ambivalent about mine. It’s also unlikely that my income will remain as high as it is now for long. I’m a senior associate in big law, and I’m not gunning to make partner. As a result, it’s unlikely that the disparity in our incomes will be as large as it is now for much longer.

It sounds like it’s probably just time for me to look for a government job with more regular hours and less stress.[/quote]

Not necessarily. See how long you can hang on to the "senior associate" or "senior attorney" or "of counsel" position rather than going part time or switching jobs.  My title is something like "senior attorney".  I've intentionally avoided partnership track.  I try hard not to bill over my minimum (1500), but it happens some years.  Every firm is different, but mine has let me hang on in this role for a long time now and I'm mostly happy with my career and have plenty of family time.  Every year they start trying to push me toward partner and every year I put them off.  I think I have a more balanced lifestyle than my friends who work in the government or in house.  [/quote]

This. So you know that you're not making partner.  But law firms have a crazy shortage of manpower right now.  Assuming you are providing some value to your firm (doing work that, if you left, there wouldn't be enough associates to handle) they need you as much or more than you need them.  You stop working so much  and stick to a 9-6 schedule, with checking in in the evenings.  You bill ALL your time; no cutting down on your time because you're worried you spent too long on something.  Drop all the dumb firm committees, "moms working group", diversity group, pro bono, blah blah.  Start dialing stuff down now. When someone in management gives you feedback that they've noticed you're not pushing as hard, or that they don't think you'll make partner, that's when you start broaching the subject about some alternative track. Is there a partner you primarily work for that you can discuss your aspirations? Another women in your department you can seek for advice?  Don't see the firm as doing you favors; they make a LOT of money off of you.  See it as a tit for tat relationship. Because the minute they're getting less from you then you're getting from them, don't worry - you'll know. Because they'll fire you. As long as they haven't fired you, you are more important to them than vice versa.

If you quit, you will never get back to anywhere near this pay. The people who get good in house jobs and govt jobs were star performers in biglaw.  The mediocre associates who were never really go getters.... if you leave the workforce, you'll end up in the admissions office in a law school or doing writing for Law 360 for like $70k a year when you go back.  Sorry that's the reality.  Better to find some way to keep your foot in the door - either at your firm or in another company.  ANd as a lawyer, i always recommend being mindful of whatever job you take - how will it look on your resume?  Remote? Part time?  You don't have to list those on your resume. You can work 5 hours a week as an attorney and it shows up on a resume the same as an attorney working 60 hours a week.  But title and company? Those matter. Focus on those while you think about taking a step down in responsibilities.  [/quote]

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