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Reply to "Anyone have a mother who likes to be stabby on your Birthday?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here, I'll make up another one for you. OP: My husband suddenly started working out a few months, and he is dressing nicer. He is working nights and going on weekend business trips. When he's home, he's snippy with me and I sometimes find him texting, and then he hides the screen. I found a pair of panties that aren't mine in his suitcase, and a pack of condoms, which we don't use. What in the world could be going on? NP: I think your DH is having an affair! DP: My DH was behaving similarly, and then I discovered he was having an affair. Crazy Lady Poster: HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT? YOU DON'T KNOW HER DH!! YOU ARE MAKING THINGS UP. FICTION!! YOU ARE A BIZARRE PERSON WHO MAKES THINGS UP ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE! So, Crazy Lady Poster, I will break it down for you. Behavior happens in patterns. Some patterns indicate certain things, like that your DH is having an affair, or that your mother has a personality disorder (PD). When your mother has a personality disorder, she has a pattern of behavior that is just like other PDs. One pattern of a PD is to DARVO in any conversation in which she in confronted by a complaint about herself. So the ensuing conversation, after telling mom "I don't like it when you lash out on my birthday," is extremely predictable. [/quote] Crazy Lady Poster == anybody who doesn't slot into your scenarios. Who's the crazy one?[/quote] Crazy Lady Poster, you have a pattern and I showed it to you. You read and post in the threads about parent/adult child difficulties even though you claim to not have those problems. You post weird circular arguments about what it is OK or not OK to say, speculate about or assume. You are triggered by the suggestion that mothers might be abusive. You DARVO. You fit the pattern of an abusive parent who has been cut off. And yeah, I know your next move is to deny that (your adult children are perfectly happy!), and accuse me of crazy behavior (I am a crazy fiction writer who has big problems!) and say that I have victimized you by saying so (you're being abusive to me! You're an abusive person!). Go ahead ... [/quote] Your ad hominems and fantasies about others' personal lives (OP's and now mine) definitely mark you out as crazy. TBH I doubt you have many strong relationships. But, thanks for asking, my two kids spent a great Thanksgiving home from college with me and are coming back for Christmas. You're so wrong it's pathetic. I'm here because I'm concerned about your cr@ppy advice and trying to protect the OP's you're targeting with it. Nothing to do with triggering.[/quote] NP here. OP already confirmed that she has tried talking to her mom, asking her to stop with the mean gifts, and that the conversation script was similar to conversations (note that it’s plural-multiple conversations) she has had with her mom. So what was your advice again? To keep doing what she already did the didn’t change things? Be grateful that she has a mean mom? [/quote]
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