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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here, and you guys are right, it was a hard time and my mom did the best she could. She needed the support of my grandparents and the lower cost of living. It was just the anniversary of my dad's death and I was having a bad day. I'll look into grief therapy. It's been 9 years and usually I'm fine, but sometimes the memories and emotions hit me like a ton of bricks.

I have talked to my mom about the divorce in the past and she did try really hard to convince my dad to get help before she decided to leave him. Like I said in the OP, I completely understand why she divorced him and do not blame her in any way for doing that. I just wish my dad could have somehow been a part of our lives more on a day to day basis. As some here have said though, he probably could have put forth more of an effort. He had a lot of issues and unfortunately he never got the proper help for his disease.

Thank you for everyone's comments. Many of you did put things into perspective.   [/quote]

A PP here. You wanted your severely alcoholic dad to have been a part of your regular life growing up? WHY?!  Let me spare you the pain as I lived it. You want to have them forget to pick you up because they’re passed out somewhere?  You want them showing up to school or your game totally drunk? You want them yelling at you for no reason?  You want to be making excuses for them because they’re too drunk to do something they should be doing AS THE PARENT?!  You want to see them urinate on themself because they’re too drunk to go to the bathroom? You want to be praying they don’t wreck the car driving you somewhere drunk?

If your father died from alcoholism when you were in your 20s , I cannot imagine what kind of drunk he was. My severely alcoholic uncle is still alive at 70, he’s been driving almost a case of bud every day since he was a teen.

Your mother saved you.  SAVED you. You need to hear this. I’m so glad for you, I honestly am. I wouldn’t wish my childhood misery on anyone. I’m sorry about your father, but he wasn’t the saint you wish he was. Live your life. Good luck. [/quote]

I’m so sorry you had to endure and experience so much as a child. I see you. [/quote]

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