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[quote=Anonymous]My family had a similar dynamic in that my father was also an alcoholic who died in my early 20s. My mother, while she never divorced him, did a lot of terrible things that impacted my siblings and I. I had resentment for a long time and actually thought we'd be estranged for the rest of my life.

But somehow I got past resentment (yes I went to therapy and learned a lot about alcoholism, al-anon and ACOA), and arrived at forgiveness, and I just wanted to share that life is just SO MUCH BETTER on this side.

I not only forgave my mother, but forgave myself for not being there, having a voice or helping as my father slowly killed himself. I know I did the best I could with the tools I had at the time (very few) and while I would never make the same decisions my mother did, I can understand, given her limited life experiences/ worldview, why she did what she did.

It is very freeing to let go of resentment and guilt. Take the necessary steps to get there.

My sister never dealt with the trauma from our childhood, and she will likely end up a similar fate as our dad.

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