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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just keep pushing occasionally for your own sanity.  I pushed my mom for years and she just kept refusing to talk about it, calling me bossy, saying she had time, etc.  She collapsed and is in hospice, assisted living care at an out-of-pocket of over $10K a month.  She was a teacher and is likely to burn her life savings.  I sleep at night by knowing I did all I could do to avoid this situation.[/quote]

Honestly if she is in hospice and has enough savings to pay for it, who cares if she spends it all? That means she had enough. You can’t take it with you. That’s what life savings are for. [/quote]

PP here.  I care because she talked on and on about how much she wanted to leave money behind to help my kids with college and now cries (quite literally) about how she messed up.  I reassure her that it's fine and don't ever bring up money on my end, but it is important to recognize that sometimes people don't want to spend every penny just on care and end up waiting too long. [/quote]

But what were her alternatives. She collapsed. Are you saying had she made better plans she wouldn't have collapsed? If Hospice is involved, that means they have determined she is at end of life. Hospice (btw) is frequently covered by medicare. She must be in assisted living because she can't care for herself and has nowhere else to go. Sounds like she was going to end up in this situation no matter what given that she collapsed. And thankfully she has money to pay for it. Just because she wanted to help with kids' college, etc., doesn't mean that at the end she would actually have the money to help with that.[/quote]

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