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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's important for mental growth of young adults to earn their own money, learn to manage it themselves and learn to live independently.

Living with mommy and daddy and being co-dependent after 21 is not a way to live and grow as adults. There is more to life than thrifting. Live on your own, manage your own budget and your own household. [/quote]

Asian family here.  My husband and I stayed home with our parents for 2 1/2 years until we saved up enough money to purchase the townhouse in cash for 250K in 1999.

My three kids lived at home after college for two years, free food and rent, to save 100% of their salaries.  They could leave the house early and come home as late as they wanted and we treated them like adults.  The kids left home after two years with 250K in the bank, bought a townhouse with 75% down payment (we gave each 250K in addition to their own 250k).  Now they have financial freedom.  My daughter will be leaving her high stress job to become a middle school teacher without having to worry about making large mortgage payments.  Staying home for two or three years is perfectly fine to build that nest egg.  Young adults will survive.

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As another Indian-American, I fully embrace this method and hope to do this for my own children in a few years.  It's great that you had the funds to provide so much for your children but even if you didn't, the fact that they could stay with you and save their own money is hugely helpful.  This is part of Asian culture.  Our parents are typically immigrants and they grew up in joint-family homes, which was common in Asia and still is in many parts of the world.  This isn't just about saving money.  The entire perspective is different.  Families care for each other in perpetuity.  Parents for their children and children for their parents.  That's the cycle.  We share - a home, food, stories, love, laughter, extended family gossip :) and yes, conflict.  And that doesn't end just because the kids turn 18.  Most 1st generation Indian/Asian kids do just fine and launch themselves into happy independent adulthoods.  When they have their own children, the family (nuclear and extended) is never too far off.  I'm not saying this is the only/best way to do it.  Just highlighting the difference between immigrants who came from individualistic vs. collective cultures and how this manifests in caring for adult children as they transition into adulthood.  Thanks for sharing your story![/quote]

You’ve painted a way too rosy picture there of Indian-American families.  Lots of guilt, manipulation, control, narcissism, . . . could go on and on.  In your mind, your adult children have done what they should do, go to college, get a STEM degree, perhaps a masters after, depending on if they are male or female, find a “suitable spouse” of equal status, settle down and marry and buy their first townhome, preferably near their parents so they can visit you every weekend. (Coming from Indian American that moved out of family home after college). [/quote]

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