Reply to How to help kids not date/marry people who trash talk their folks

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mother told me not to marry into a divorced family.

I didn’t, but it just happened to work out that way.

What she could not predict is how the family would shift and change as the first in law was introduced. Looking back, I would tell me kid not to be the first in law. It’s tough.[/quote]

My mother told me not to marry into a fmaily with any cancer. Now that we have plenty of cancer in ours, she got over herself.

She told me not to marry someone from a family with divorce. I did and my marriage is happier and more stable than her drama filled "marriage" ever was.

I think you need to focus on whether it's a good person with good values. Hopefully your kids know better than to hang out with anyone who just trash talks anyone, but um...pot meet kettle so maybe not. If a person can speak reflectively and with genuine understanding about about a dysfunctional upbringing and can see their parent as a complex human being who made mistakes, i see no issue. I have to say though, the people I know who ramble on about trash talk and gossip being a problem, are the biggest culprits.[/quote]

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