Reply to Single mom, 34 and twice divorced...will my stats scare potential mates?

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Reply to "Single mom, 34 and twice divorced...will my stats scare potential mates?"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP here: To the 9:58 poster, thank you for your insight.

For my first marriage, I was young and unaware/uninformed about mental illness. I thought he loved me when he was nice and charming, yet I was very confused when he turned manic, mean and depressed. He also didn't want to have any more children (and I did) - he had two from a previous relationship. What I didn't mention in my earlier post (which I now see I should have) was the length of our marriage (5.5 years) and the extensive thereapy (individual -I with a social worker and he with a psychiatrist to treat his bi polar) and couples therapy (marriage counselling) with our church leader. When it was all said and done, we decided we were better off apart...and the therapy we had is the main reason we remain friends. The divorce was not bitter -we amicably parted ways.

For my second marriage, I was in it for the long haul. I was older, had been divorced before and wanted this one to work. From the begging, we dicussed what we both wanted out of it, we had the same expectations, or so I thought...I went into it whole hartedly and was ready to have a better experience and marriage. It just didn't work out that way. He was maintaining a marriage with me, and a relationship with his ex. I found out he told her I was his roomate, and that he had moved to the same city as me to continue his eduaction. He was lying to both of us...and when I found out, I was already pregnant. I didn't immediatley think about leaving, however, when he told me he was not willing to end it with his ex, and thought "I should either deal with things as is and accept it, or move on," I decided I was better off without him. He moved out of our home and straight into her house.

Maybe for some, my reasons for leaving both marriages are not valid. But I think I made the decisions I thought would be best for me. Granted, there is a flaw in my mate selection process, however, my initial question was more about how my stats look, rather than my desire to wanting to get married right away and how my chances looked for that. I don't need a mate for financial support in raising my son, however I also don't believe because my first two marriages ended, I am doomed to having healthy, long lasing and fulfilling companionships when the time is right. 
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